That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize