shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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