A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
