thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
So squirting runs in the family.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
