when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
What drink are we having for lunch?
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
