This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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