Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
