I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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