Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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