Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
