So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
