I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
