And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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