is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
ugly people sure do ruin things
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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