after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
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