Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
