At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
