You work out of a Hotel?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
