so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
