My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
