he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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