how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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