Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
