Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
