Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
