i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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