sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
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