Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
