Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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