Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
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