I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
