bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
