If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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