sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize