bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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