So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
