i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
smell my finger.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Randomize
