Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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