mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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