i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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