We won't sleep together?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
