you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
