i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
