My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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