Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
