How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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