her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Randomize