Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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