hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize