No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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