she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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